House of Cards
One of my absolute favorite books is Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland. This has a vague connection to my title, but very little to do with what I intend to write about. I am writing this disclaimer in the hope that a connection will come to me, but it hasn’t worked yet. House of Cards, the court in the end of the book, falling down…boom, instant connection! Nope, nothing.
My vacation, as I think I mentioned before, is becoming less and less vacation-y with each passing day. It’s like a house of cards caving in. Once one thing went, everything else followed. One of the students feeding the horses bailed, so I had to pick up the slack. Feeding one hundred and fifty horses three times a day is not something I enjoy doing on my vacation. Especially in a place as run-down and disorganized as this one. I’ve had no time to do anything, including update my blog and call my best friend on her birthday (obviously not in order of importance). Taking care of so many animals in different places has left me with a constant panicky feeling. Did I remember everyone? What day did I need to do that? IS THE FISH STILL ALIVE?! (Yes, it is, despite being forgotten for four days. Also, I desperately wish my keyboard had a real interrobang symbol on it.)
Being here and doing all of this is making me seriously reconsider how much of my life I want to commit to this place. I was originally planning on six or nine months, but I may just end it in February, when the quarter is done. I don’t want to be here for another break. It’s fucking misery.
So, job searching? Yes. Boyd Martin is looking for a working student. That won’t be open in February, it’ll fill way before then. And I can’t quit, no matter how tempting it may be. California…that’s where I want to go. Nothing fabulous on yardandgroom. I marked a few possibilities and am feeling better about life. Besides, I do like some of the people here (Sam) and would feel rotten leaving. I know she won’t be leaving any time soon but when she does I want to know. I’d work for her if she got a place going. But I won’t stay here until then. Fuck that, five more years here? No thanks. I’m thinking six months is too long.
I didn’t think I’d have enough energy for a decent post, but it came out okay. I bit rant-y but I suppose that’s the reason I created this. It’s good to be back, hopefully this last week will be less stressful.